Written by Otaku Apologist
This week, I finally broke into League 2 of Cunt Wars. I’ve been playing this game since summer 2018, steadily investing a portion of my blogging income every month. It’s been fun to play this game after it finally stopped lagging.
If you still haven’t seen it, read my review of Cunt Wars. It’s the best western porn game right now.
I lost count after spending over $1000 into my collection of digital cards. I’m probably at $1400. Does that sound excessive? Only if you’re broke and have no ambitions to be the most badass porn gamer ever!
Every time you complete a chapter in an event, you unlock a CG unique to the event with a fully written sex scene!
During my Magic the Gathering days, I spent over $2000 to booster packs and online purchases. Back then, I had no idea where the hell my life was going, so buying stupid shit was how I passed the time. Magic was fun, but then Wizards of the Coast started publishing new sets and rotating out old sets at an increased speed during the Alara block. My town’s Magic group died. People had no reason to invest into their collections when the cards became obsolete in Friday Night Magic tournaments and nationals in a matter of months.
So, what’s the point of being league 2 in Cunt Wars, compared to league 20? Did I unlock new content? Did anyone congratulate me? Are bitches flocking to my dick? No. No. And also no. The only reward this game provides is a boost to your ego.
And when you think about it, isn’t that the sole reason we do most things in life? Why do we want fancy cars, fancy clothes, a big house, or large families? Because they feel nice. Because people we hate will feel jealous.
My current Cunt Wars build has changed little since 2018. I’m still using Bastet, Regardus Diplius, Mr. Flap, Queen Ananta, Void Juggler, and Miss Lapin. Evil Santa and Shao-Lin are the only newcomers. It’s virtually impossible to switch the cards in your deck until their power reaches a high might. Events are practically the only avenue for that.
I started using Evil Santa to deal with the over-leveled monsters with 100+ health points. He’s the reason I ranked up.
Porn games are a great way to unplug from the brutality of the real game. You get the best bitches with the biggest asses without having to suffer hundreds of rejections in the selection process. I am just happy to help you get off.
Unless you like beautiful women, swag, and being surrounded by sychopanths leeching off your aura of success, you’re better off staying home jacking off to anime cunts in the darkness of your room. Start playing Cunt Wars.