Written by Otaku Apologist

The story of king Lute Hende of Edelland in Funbag Fantasy: Sideboob Story is like the presidential reign of the 45th US president, Donald Trump. Since the beginning of his rule, he has been winning, winning, and winning, I’m almost tired of seeing him always winning.

The parallels between Lute Hende and Trump are many. Both guys are eccentric personalities who fake idiocy, and talk like commoners, while masking their superior intelligence behind the social mask of a joker. Acting in an offensive, triggering manner, Lute Hende gets his opponents to drop their guard, and slip out information that allows him to easily counter their strategies. Throughout the visual novel, Lute has been unstoppable in deciphering the assassination plots against him. He inspires his subjects and makes his women swoon.

As the story has progressed, I’ve grown out of my own animosity towards Lute, just like the in-game characters are growing to respect him for his deeds and his virtues. I expected Lute to be another brainless harem anime male protagonist, but instead, he’s a total badass in both politics and sex.

The erasure of respectable male characters from American and Japanese media has been annoying the fuck out of me for years. A fumbling perverted male protagonist that can’t even talk to girls, let alone cause one an orgasm, is relatable in your early teens when your testosterone levels are fucked. Beyond those painful years of growth, you need to be exposed to positive male influences in order to grow into a man. It’s not easy growing out of your flawed base nature, and fiction plays a critical role in shaping the mental image we have of masculinity, and the associated virtues we ought to strive to embody.

I’m happy with the portrayal of the male protagonist in Funbag Fantasy. Despite what everyone says, he has balls.

This hentai visual novel presents itself almost as a slapstick comedy, but behind the joker is a story of depth. While everybody and their mother tries to usurp the throne from Lute, his rivals are not able to surprise him. By default, Lute doesn’t trust anybody. He fakes idiocy during his conversations with the monarchs of rival kingdoms, jokingly derailing serious discussions with talk of boobs and asses. He constantly shocks everyone with his total lack of care for etiquette and appearances. His strategies are victorious.

Lute’s source of power is his sexual prowess. Because he is able to provide his harem of buxom babes ultimate pleasure, they work tirelessly to build the kingdom of Edelland into a prosperous nation. Orgasms are vital for pair-bonding between males and females, and it just so happens that the women in Lute’s harem are military commanders, magicians, and queens of the highest social status. It’s the women who make him powerful. A good example is Lute’s marriage with the succubus Shamsiel, strategically important beyond her daily boobjobs.

Lute Hende is also not a coward. Despite coming off as an idiot that landed on the throne by accident, he shows off his nerves of steel time after time. When faced with vicious monsters like wraiths, golems and succubi, he doesn’t even flinch. The women love his fearless nature and reward his royal penis with their adoration and their bosoms.

You wouldn’t expect a porn game to bear cultural significance, but this game does. It’s not a critical re-evaluation of the logic of cultural norms, but a fat fuck you to the cutthroat social ladder climbers of society. Petty sociopathic players who only think status and their position in hierarchies are the enemies that Lute Hende keeps swatting like flies. Narcissistic emotionally stunted players are not fit to be rulers, even though every society on Earth has this scum in positions of power.

While history is filled with stories of wise rulers who worked to better people’s lives, it’s important not to forget they were always under threat of imminent death. The best people often die. There’s always big players with a lot of money who’ll do anything to maintain their grip on power, including murder.

If you enjoy the visual novel format, I can heartily recommend this game as your next masturbation aide. The production values from the music to the voices to the art are incredible. The $44.95 price tag feels like a bargain for the quality fap times you’re in for while playing this superb sex game.

Funbag Fantasy, and Funbag Fantasy: Sideboob Story are available for download on MangaGamer.com.