Hentai Game Review: Fake Lay
Written by Otaku Apologist
Fake Lay, developed by Endless Fun Studio. Published on Nutaku in October 2017. A clicker / dating sim, this game is a frankenstein’s monster of hentai clickbait memes. It’s inspired by the porn site “Fake Taxi”, cancerous clicker games like Crush Crush, there’s classic dating sim concepts. You’re even filming porn of the girls!
Story
This game has no plot. The premise is, that you’re some dude running a porn business, driving around picking up girls in your cab. You take them in, and bribe them into becoming your personal cum dumpster porn stars. You encourage them to get naked, pimp them for cash, and fuck them. Sweet talk, and money are the path to success for any man, right? Despite the cheerful tone, it’s a very dark cynical game.
Art
The art is absolutely shitty. The characters are ravaged by sexually transmitted diseases, and birth defects caused by generations of multicultural incest. Just looking at these women makes me want to quit hookers. Everything is just all over the place, from the body proportions, to the faces. Backgrounds are terribad as well. And the interface? The developers managed to make it more cancerous than the rainbow spectrum menu of Crush Crush. You could not make a worse looking trash game even if you tried on purpose. This game reeks of red-pilling, it oozes of utter hatred for humanity.
The positive is that there’s some animation. The girls move their lips when talking, there’s always some object moving on screen, keeping your lizard brain engaged. Little things like the porn films hovering in the air, look nice.
But like always, anime fappers of multicultural socialist hell states, have zero self-esteem, and zero standards. As of time of writing, this shitty game is topping Nutaku’s charts. Millions of fappers, are preferring to waste their life to this, than the hundreds of better games out there. I fully expect this to become Nutaku’s most played game for the next year. Please just kill me.
Gameplay
The gameplay is blatantly ripped off from Crush Crush. You click the girls, to gain points in the affection meter, displayed as a thermometer. You click, click, click, and click, and the hearts flood the screen. When you reach a new level with a girl, you film her, and make money from selling the film. Then you start working towards the next affection level, where she undresses even more. You choose how to spend your “energy” into various tasks. You choose which of your businesses churn out cash. You choose skills you want to level up. The girls necessitate that you’re a certain level at ie. seduction, art of sex, filming, or other, before they let you film another scene. New businesses unlock as your skill levels increase. New girls unlock as you progress.
The game has a special feature that it keeps progressing while you’re offline. You gain money, and skill levels when you’re not playing.
To get the girls naked, they require that you take them to dates, and give them gifts, Just check the requirements from the right-side bar. When you progress in affection levels, you also gain more energy.
To put it simple, you are managing a cynical porn business, abusing working class women for profit. If this ghetto scenario stirs the sperm in your testicles, fuck you. You’re part of the problem.
Music
I’ve only heard one song in Fake Lay. It’s a poppy computer generated dinga-linga jingle. Warning: it stays in your head if you’re exposed to it too much. If you’re depressed to the point of suicide, just listen to this song: it’s like hipster angels throwing a rave party in heaven.
Voice acting and sound effects (SFX)
I absolutely hate the audio of this game. The sharp blips and boops generated from clicking shit, are something from a children’s cartoon. I don’t mean anime, but like Teletubbies, or Thomas the Tank Engine. The sound I hate the most is the hearts; when you click a girl, pink hearts are generated out of nothing, they give this icky sound that you hear 90% of your playtime. It’s like air bubbles, rising to the surface while you’re drowning under water.
Hentai
It doesn’t take long before the sluts undress. They aren’t shy about being high school dropouts with drug addictions, and zero life prospects, forcing them to slut it out for cash. When you’ve unlocked the very last relationship level, you can watch an awkward loop of the girl taking a floating dick in her pussy. These scenes are voice-acted, and it sounds like the C-tier actresses were really forcing themselves into this. It’s horrendously terrible.
Business model
The game is free to play, meaning, there’s an in-game shop to buy various goods. You can buy gold, time warps, time boosts, double your income from porn films, and more. The game conditions you to get accustomed to the in-game premium currency, which is diamonds. You gain diamonds from normal play, at a steady, slow pace. 30 diamonds is enough to buy a massive speed boost, without needing to reset the game. The game has a reset function that levels down your progress to zero, but grants a massive speed boost in return – this feature is also ripped off from Crush Crush. Just save up diamonds and you can use this feature for free without reset!
Concluding words
It’s always a conflicting experience to review hentai browser games. I make my living from promoting these games in my various sites. They’re also really fun to play, I’ve clocked thousands of hours on most titles up on Nutaku. But when you get down to it, most if not every aspect of Fake Lay is terrible. It steals all of its ideas from other games, doesn’t improve on anything. There’s little positive to say about a game that’s based on addiction, looks like shit, and treats the human race with utter contempt.
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